and the rains came down and washed it all away...

The worst part of my job of delivering newspapers is not the 2AM start time, nor the 364 days a year, though that is hard to handle. Nor is it the cold winter nights, the ice, or the wind and rain - those are fleeting in the grand scheme of things.

The worry of running into a skunk usually amounts to nothing as they amble off, in search of more garbage. Waving the paper in front of you helps to dispel the occasional spider web. You learn to lift your feet so as not to trip over kids' toys, or garden hoses, or small plants left in your way that you cannot see in the dark. And to listen for that telltale sississ of the sprinkler system starting up before the water streams out in an unknown direction that could likely be where you are standing.

I hate running into people in the elevators. I am tired and dirty and sweaty and don't smell nearly as fresh as they who are newly awake and recently showered.

No, the worst part is the ever present markings of newsprint. It gets everywhere. And by everywhere, I mean everywhere that you touch. Your face, your hair, your clothes, the apple fritter that you stupidly decided you needed, the door that you push to open, the handrail, the switch plate, the taps ... and most irritatingly, the steering wheel. Because once it is on the steering wheel, the whole dirty process starts over again every time you are in the car. It is not easy to wash off. It takes a lot of furious scrubbing. Dish soap is often the best for getting through the grime. But there is almost always still a touch of it embedded within your fingerprints. Dark grey water droplets get all over the sink and the counter and walls and mirror if you are stupid enough to automatically shake your damp hands before drying off with a towel. It goes without saying that I have no white towels.

Oh, I know, there are ways around this. I could wear latex gloves - some people do - but I find them irritating and they never fit properly on my short fingers. And that wouldn't stop the problem of newsprint getting all over the steering wheel. I could wash the steering wheel every morning ... but we all know that is not going to happen. I could have Wet Ones (or equivalent) and use them after every twenty papers or so, but that would just make my hands sticky. And eat into my time and profit because I'd be going through an awful lot of them with 320 papers a night (400 + inserts on Saturday).

Last night (Saturday morning delivery) had to be one of the worst. Not only did we get lashings of rain pissing down as if the gods (all of them) were pouring out buckets, but I 'scared' two - 2! - skunks who were playing in the puddles. I can still taste the acrid smell in the back of my throat, though I don't think they sprayed very much and at least not directly at me or my car. I backed into a bright yellow bollard that I couldn't see for the heavy rain and fogged up windows, denting and scraping the new paint job on the rear bumper.

BUT, it was my last night for one of the papers. It was not easy to decide to give up a contract job (though after last night...). I know that I am tired of being tired all the time. There are so many other things I would like to do - like take a few more little holidays. Go to a few more fall festivals. Stay up late and watch Jon Stewart at 11 instead of at noon the next day. I can replace the exercise (?!) I'm losing by going on early morning hikes. There are over 100 waterfalls to explore in the city of Hamilton. And my car will be just a little bit less dirty.

I will hopefully fit in a few more massage appointments to pay for the car repairs.....