Wednesday, September 23, 2009

what I like to see

When I was about 12, I got my first pair of glasses. I distinctly remember sitting in our living room and staring at the wallpaper - the flocked wallpaper (well, it was 1970) and realizing I could see the gold flocking. I could actually see the furry swirls raised from the rest of the wallpaper. It seems so obvious, but at the time it was new and exciting. I would sit on the chesterfield and bob my head up and down to see the difference in my improved eyesight. And I'm not even that blind. For more than 30 years I had the exact same prescription. The frames changed. The size of the lenses certainly changed. But the prescription, not a bit. I only needed the glasses for distance and even then, not all the time. I was always losing them at school. So I eventually stopped wearing them unless absolutely necessary. As a result, when I did wear them I was amazed all over again at the clarity and detail.

This all changed about 6 years ago, coincidentally just in time for our provincial health plan to delist vision care. I started having trouble reading those big signs in the middle of the grocery aisles to say what was in each aisle. Worse, I realized that I would be holding the boxes of cereal at varying distances to get the right angle to be able to read the information that is so vital to be included that it is in the tiniest font size available. It turned out my regular prescription needed to be stronger. AND, I needed reading glasses. Bifocals were recommended. I bit the inside of my cheek and tried not to shed any tears. I went home with new, stronger, prescription distance glasses and a pair of invisible bifocals. I sat on the chesterfield and bobbed my head up and down (I was told to do this, to get used to them) to watch television and read a book at the same time. This time, it wasn't so exciting. It was more dizzying than anything else. Then, the invisible line bifocals were almost the same style as the distance ones and within a matter of weeks I had trouble knowing which were which.

I ended up later getting another pair of reading glasses. I keep magnifying glasses in every room because that is so much easier. Except for reading books. I still need to work on that. And now I need another, stronger, prescription. I get headaches whenever I try to read the newspaper or a magazine. I find I check out the print before I even consider buying or reading a book. I can't get away with not wearing the glasses any more. All those blurry letters make my head spin, my eyes water, and scare me even a little. I hate to see anything out of focus. When I upload my photos I spend hours scrutinizing each one to determine the one that is the most in focus.

My mother had macular degeneration and for the longest time she struggled with doing the crossword and knitting as her eyesight deteriorated. I have no idea how she did it. Sheer determination and pig-headedness, most likely. Instead of biting my cheek, I had to bite my tongue to stop from complaining about my needing new reading glasses after 30 years. I maybe don't like anything to be out of focus, but I still have the opportunity to fix that. For the time being.

In the meantime, I have to take a blurry, out of focus photo for my new team blog lens.us.together. It is an unbelievably difficult challenge. I could just take an out of focus shot, but there would be no meaning to that. I need to find one that has a reason for being.

24 comments:

  1. I've also had glasses for distance since I was 11 or 12. And I also started noticing how hard it was getting to read newspapers and cereal boxes about 5 years ago. But I then chose to get contacts for the first time (I'm too vain to wear glasses all the time, you see!). I have one lens for the distance viewing, and the other is for the up-close stuff. It works well for me and I've had the same prescriptions all this time. But of course it will worsen ... damn this aging process!

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  2. I have reading glasses all over my house and I'm forever losing them! I'm still okay with distance but up close...my arms arn't long enough!
    Sunny :)

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  3. I've got varifocal lenses. I have difficult eyes because they don't work together, so have to have prisms in my lenses to pull them together. (No, don't ask me how, I just pay the cost!) So after my cataract operation I had to have yet another pair of expensive glasses. Mind you, I can see beautifully now!

    I wear mine all the time, so don't put them and forget where I have put them! I stopped being vain when as a student I got on the wrong bus because I didn't wear my glasses!

    But ask about varifocals. They are my life saver!

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  4. I've got glasses for distance that don't allow me to see a thing up close, so I have to take them off. Then I still need reading glasses. I never can read the fine print on packaging in the supermarket. It's so frustrating!

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  5. Pinklea: I could never wear contacts. I have enough trouble putting that mascara wand so close to my eyeball.

    Sunny: I've been known to lose them while wearing them, especially with those ultra light titanium frames.

    Gilly: I've never heard of varifocals - will look that up (maybe we use a different term?)

    Nora: People used to laugh at me because eventually I couldn't read with my old glasses on so I'd be forever taking them off and moving things around.

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  6. Oh boy, I'm with you, Sister! I couldn't live without my glasses. I got progressive lenses (varifocals) about 8 years ago and it changed my life. It took about 10 days to get used to them, but after that no more peering over or under or taking them off to read. Although now I'm noticing that I need a new prescription.

    The trick to seeing through bifocals or progressive lenses is pointing your nose where you want to see. At first you feel like an owl, but you get used to it. Walking is fun at first and the hardest for me was getting used to turning my head when driving.

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  7. Susan: And here I was thinking 'progressive lenses' were those that turned into sunglasses. I imagine stairs are tricky too - I never even attempted that with the bifocals.

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  8. I got my first pair of glasses at 6. With my astigmatism, I'm pretty much at a loss without my glasses, whatever the distance.

    I left the Doctor's office with my new specs - and was amazed at the individual leaves in the trees. I could actually see a blade of grass! it was a whole new world. How I loved those glasses.

    And I remember the denial that I needed bifocals - until I could no longer deny. Bifocals meant old age and decrepitude, but then, once again I could actually see! Though I'm still not too big on the fact i need bifocals. Thank god for progressive lenses.

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  9. Oh I so relate to your post. I've always had excellent sight, a tiny bit far-sighted but nothing dramatic, but in the last two years my eyes have really gone downhill - and it's kinda scary. At first I resisted glasses but now I just can't see the print properly, unless it's big, when I read.

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  10. I've always had better than 20/20 vision, which means I can see a lot farther than the average person, but I stopped being able to see very well close up a few years ago. It's SO annoying. I'm shopping and want to read a label. I used to be able to do this and am still always try for some reason.

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  11. being over 40 is that weird time where I have to wear cheaters too. I'm up to 2x just because I love to read so much.

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  12. I have only been wearing reading glasses for the last few years but I need them now for the computer too. I have an opticians appointment in a few weeks and I rather hope I can wear glasses all the time so I won't have to keep taking them on and off. Also I am going to getting graduated lenses and anti-glare as sunlight and glare really bother me.

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  13. Jazz: yeah, I guess if I want to read signs and drive at the same time, I will have to accept the bifocals.

    AV: I could easily get by without my glasses, and the idea that I can't any longer is hard.

    XUP: people who can drive and see a red tail hawk fascinate me. I've never had eyesight that good. I just see a grey flying blob.

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  14. Char: everybody seems to have this inconvenience in their 40s.

    Berni: sunlight and glare has always bothered me. It seems to have gotten worse since I've been working nights.

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  15. Great post - I remember have a similar OMG experience with my first glasses. There was suddenly so much detail in the world!

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  16. I'm like Xup and can see crazy clear distance-wise, but a few years ago I finally had to get reading glasses and now I have them all over the house. And besides reading, I also need them to thread a needle or any other small task like that. It is very irritating when you've always had perfect vision to lose it. Good luck!

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  17. I hear ya!! And it seems so does everyone else. It seems my eyes were PERFECT until I turned-----40-----and then all of a sudden I had a hard time reading the small print. so I got reading glasses that I was forever losing so then I got progressive lenses and eventually I started wearing the darned glasses all the time. DRAT!!! MB

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  18. I had perfect vision until a couple of year sgao. Now I own a pair of invisible bifocals that have clear glass on the top for distance. I shold have just gotten cheap reading glasses.

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  19. Since I was ten I had short sight & it deteriorated over the years quite a lot.
    Then of course, mid forties, I needed reading glasses so wore reading glasses over contact lens.
    Eventually I had to get varifocals (which are Hellishly expensive) but they are wonderful except I cannot watch TV while lying down!

    That macular degeneration is a terrible thing. My mother in law had it for the last 10 years of her life.

    Interesting post (for anyone who wears glasses and that must be most of the population!)

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  20. Deborah: it makes you want to just sit and stare at the world!

    MB: do we feel better for all having this shared experience??

    SAW: what, no half lenses?? you might look quite professorial with those (if they still exist)

    Maggie May: I find I can't read while lying down with my reading glasses without my chin on my chest - not very comfortable.

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  21. You have your history with glasses, and so I have. As a teen I would be searching everywhere, till someone told me they were on the top of my head LOL
    Some years ago my eyesight changed and I got progressive lenses. But remember a few years ago when the glss frames became really tiny? I wanted one of those. They told me it was possible, if I would have short-stop lenses. They are progressive lenses, but the distance of distance and nearness in the lens is shortened.

    You have to get used to it - it made me dizzy at first, or I would make a misstep because I was looking through the wrong part of my glasses. Now I'm used to it, I like it!

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  22. Jeannette: it is so embarrassing when you find your glasses on your head, isn't it? So how long beofre the dizziness went away?

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  23. gee there must be something in the air .. is it the economy? ha.. both John and I had to start wearing reading glasses this year too.. drives me nuts!!!

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  24. Welcome to the club! It drove me crazy to wear different glasses for distance and reading...I kept losing them too...now I have incredibly expensive progressive lens glasses and just keep them on all the time...it's easier that way!

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