Wednesday, June 25, 2008

skipping naked through the dew

Around these parts we have had rather a lot of rain of late. Yesterday was actually the first day the weather forecast did not include any of the words: rain, showers, thunder storms.

The rain hasn't been that bad. And there has been rather a lot of sunshine throughout it all, so it certainly hasn't been gloomy. And, until today there has been no humidity. The clouds have been amazing, too.

So, no, I am not complaining about the weather.

I have three part-time jobs. None of them are what you might call the normal 9-5 kind. And none of them include sitting at a desk. Or in front of a computer. I consider myself very fortunate for that.

One of my jobs involves being outside. Making deliveries. In the middle of the night. I do a fair bit of walking in between a lot of driving.

I also do a fair bit of lawn walking as I make my way up to your front porch.

Where I drop off

your newspaper.

Every night. Rain or moonshine.

Now, what I have noticed over the years is that an awful lot of people have these automatic sprinkler systems. They seem to be timed to come on no matter what the weather. Rain or drought.

A few years ago when we had a water ban, a snitch line was set up to report people who insisted on watering their lawn. I don't think it was very successful, or that anyone was actually charged never mind deterred. One of the offenders happened to be the local cop shop. A friend of mine called the snitch line. Nothing changed. He tried to make sure the bag their paper was in got wet.

Really, those verdant green patches were not hard to miss among all the dull brown patches. Interestingly, once it finally did rain, the lawns turned


Just like that.

Gardening experts will say that a once a week soaking is enough. Yet, there are many people who insist on a nightly or every other nightly soaking. Mushrooms are starting to sprout. Some lawns are veritable bogs.

It has rained every day for more than 2 weeks. Heavy soaker type rain. Light soaker type drizzle. Every type of rain imaginable.
Type 33 (light pricking drizzle which made the roads slippery), to 39 (heavy spotting). [Types] 47-51 (vertical light drizzle through to sharply slanting light to moderate drizzle freshening), 87 and 88 (two finely distinguished varieties of vertical torrential downpour), 100 (post downpour squalling) all the seastorm types between 192 and 213 at once, 123, 124, 126, 127 (mild and intermediate cold gusting, regular and syncopated cab drumming), 11 (breezy droplets), and [even the least favourite of all], type 17. Rain type 17 was a dirty blatter blattering against the windscreen so hard that it didn't matter whether the wipers were on or off. *

Yet, still people are contributing to this wanton waste of water. Gallons and gallons of water on a lawn that is not thirsty.

At this time of year, the dew is heavy on the leaf. Your lawn is soaked to the skin in dew.
Trust me. It is true.

At midsummer it is a tradition to walk in the dew barefoot to help keep your skin from getting chapped, or wash your face in it to help keep your complexion young.

Or roll around naked in it for healing. Or skip naked through it for fertility.

I have not encountered anyone rolling around naked. Thank God.

Folks you are ruining the dew.

For more midsummer festivities and pictures see The Iceland Weather Report

* So long, and thanks for all the fish
the fourth book in the Hitch Hiker Trilogy


  1. Oh my. When I first saw the title of this post, my first thought was "Why was she skipping naked through Mountain Dew, and do I really want to know why? ;-)

    I agree with you about the lawn sprinklers. People are just too impatient.

  2. good headline grab, eh?

    and no, I haven't been skipping. naked or otherwise.

  3. I wish we had naked newspaper delivery people in our neighbourhood. It would give me an added incentive to getting up really early.

  4. It amazes me how supid and wasteful people can be.

    If you catch someone rolling naked in the dew I hope you have your camera on you. ;-)

  5. Oh I loved this! I mean it makes me mad, but I loved what you wrote about the dew. I didn't know about walking in it and washing your face with it for the moisture. I love that idea.

    We've decided we will never again water the lawn, no matter what. But to let the sprinklers go even when it's raining is despicable. Water is precious.

  6. XUP: There are some ghastly images out there when fully clothed.

    Whim: Camera and flash in car, yes!

    Ruth: I often get out my frustration with these people by tossing that paper right at the front door. Futile, and juvenile, I know.

    Robin: He is one guy who can bring me out of any funk.

  7. oh my goodness... to roll naked in the dew... what a thought! ;)

  8. Problem is dew brings out the worms.

    Wouldn't like to roll in those.

    Skipping naked in the dew is the sort of thing you did when you were a teenager with your first girlfriend as a dare...

    No? Just me then...those were the days!


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